Why Can't This Generation Get It Together ?!?!

Soooooo I was thinking and...my generation is screwed up beyond explanation .

Like how is it possible that us girls chase these guys who only wanna lay up under you and possess that sweet temple of yours ?

What happen to wanting a guy who not only has goals for himself, but is doing something about it ?
What happen to wanting a guy who would rather stay at home and watch movies instead of clubbing every other night ?
What happen to us wanting a man who would one day be a good father and a great person for your future children to look up to ?

Now a days, we've gotten so caught up in the images and personas of people , especially on Instagram, that we've forgotten how to even hold a regular conversation in person. We don't even have conversations over the phone anymore. We validate if someone is worth our time simply by what they're texting us. And half of the time, the person isn't even real with you to begin with !

I am so sick and tired of running into the same type of dudes and dealing with the same type of stuff and drama. Like I know guys can be assholes a lot but us females are just as guilty. That's the problem. Females don't want to admit when they're wrong and at fault. We have to be able to look at ourselves and evaluate what we need to work on and what needs to be improved. We demand that the guy we're involved with needs to be LOYAL, HONEST, TRUSTWORTHY, CARING, GOAL-ORIENTED, IN SCHOOL, GETS $$, APPRECIATIVE, & LOVING, etc. But if we can't even provide to him even 3 of these characteristics to him, how the HELL can we expect him to be that for us ?!!?! Where is the logic in that ?

I'm not perfect. I've made many mistakes in the past and I do not pass judgement on anyone AT ALL. But ladies, we've got to do better. Everyone deserves to be happy but that happiness won't come if you won't willingly work on yourself for the better.



Peace, Love, & Blessings
Bianca D

Ladies, What Are You Waiting For & Whyyyyyy ?

                         

        So you've been involved with a guy for a year, huh ? You've done everything you thought your were supposed to be doing. You've met the family, his sister is now your bestfriend, you even go to events with the family. But yet, you still have no title. 

What the devil are you waiting for?!

Why are you giving this man all of you when it's clear he isn't trying to be with you. You have invested time and effort into this man and you just can't understand why he is so hesitant to give you that silly 'ole title. 

You gotta ask yourself a few questions. 

1. Is he someone you can build a life with ?
        Could you see yourself starting a family with him? A man who is serious about you can see you as a potential wife. If you, however, can't even fathom the thought of him placing the ring on your finger, why are you even bothering to become his "wife"? If you're only concerned about what he's bringing to the table NOW and not what can he contribute to your life in the long run, then you, My dear, have your desires and priorities all mixed up. 

2. What are his life goals? Does he even have any?
        How is this man going to provide for his family (the one you so desperately want to start with him) ? Let's say y'all are in college and graduation is soon approaching. Does he have a plan after he walks across that stage? Is he doing anything relevant to securing a job within his major/field? Is he involved in any campus activities? Is he doing anything beneficial in his spare time? If you have to hesitate to answer any of those questions, Ladies, there lies the problem right there. HE AIN'T DOING NOTHING !!!  Why do you even want to be with him? I'm going to safely assume that you are indefinitely trying to be a bum right along with him since you want to be with him so bad. 

3. What can YOU contribute to his life?
       This is probably one of the best questions you can ask yourself. What are you doing that will be fruitful to this relationship you desire. Never put yourself in a predicament where you are NOTHING without him and can't survive on your own two feet if he ever decided to leave. My mother always told me to never depend on a man because you "have to". You and your man are meant to be one. But if half of that is missing because you aren't bringing anything to the table, how in the world can that relationship survive?

4. Does he have a relationship with God?
        ****I am in NO WAY trying to disrespect anyone's religious beliefs, however, I am a Christian so most of my religious beliefs and statements will be Christian based. If anyone feels offended, I will apologize for that in advance but please know I will in NO WAY apologize for who and what I believe in.****
       Well, does he? Whether you're a devout Christian or not, God should be in the center of your relationship. When all the worldy goods are gone, it is only in Him that you can depend on. If you have a relationship with God but your man's isn't as strong as yours, help him. Take him to church with you, go to bible study together. You both should take the time out in your day to sit with God and read the bible and strengthen your relationship with him. I am now starting to do that just to better myself so that when a Godly man does come along, I can be spiritual with him. If there's no relationship with God, your relationship is destined to fail. 

5. Is this what you REALLY want ? 
       After carefully considering all pros and cons, do you still want to be with this man? Is he still desirable in all aspects? You have to know if he is truly what you want before starting something with him. 

After these questions have been considered and he isn't really up to par but you're still waiting on a miracle that he will be, cut it off. No man should ever make you wait and you should never get with a man who can't get himself together. Save yourself the trouble because trust me, there is better out there for you.


Peace, Love, & Blessings,

Bianca D.